Re: MD The Transformation of Love

From: Elizaphanian (elizaphanian@tiscali.co.uk)
Date: Fri Jun 13 2003 - 12:09:25 BST

  • Next message: Steve Peterson: "Re: Re: MD The Transformation of Love"

    Hi Rick,

    > RICK
    > Disagree. Marriage born of Amor wants to shed expectations like "life-long"
    > and "between a man and woman". That sort of discrimination can never lead
    > to equality. Amor is individual love, it cares not about the public and
    > their silly expectations. Remember, to the Troubadours, the love between
    > individuals was the highest love of all and socially restraining that would
    > be immoral (there may be a tie-in with Sam's Eudemonia here).
    >
    > The place marriage wants to go is a voluntary, loving union between
    > autonomous individuals. That's the endgame of equality for all humanity
    > (or, the humans that wish to marry anyway).

    My dissatisfaction with how the MoQ describes marriage (at least as I experience it) was indeed the
    original seed for my eudaimonic thesis. See my post from January 2002:
    http://www.venus.co.uk/hypermail/moq_discuss/0201/0062.html

    I think there is potential in the correspondence - eros = biological level love, agape = social
    level love, amor = fourth level love. I'll think about that some more, but it seems good (and
    eudaimonic!). Just as the higher levels are built upon the lower elsewhere, it seems to me that you
    can only have amor if the lower levels are also satisfied, which means, amongst other things, that
    adultery (to my mind) cannot be amor (although consider also the 'sex, lies and videotape' example I
    asked Paul about).

    In terms of the desire to see a debate focussing on actualities, rather than theory, this seems like
    a good place. (Although I don't foresee any agreement being found - I can't imagine any logically
    compelling argument that would change someone's mind on this.) I think the debate sharpens on this
    question: what has more value - a person or an idea? I would say a person, but the Pirsig of Lila
    says an idea, or - to be more precise - he defines a person this way: "A human being is a collection
    of ideas", which I think is nonsense. (I would say a human being is a pattern of values, composed of
    each level, not just level 4 - although that is where I would locate something important). So
    Pirsig's position is that the value of a human being is derivative - a human being is of value in so
    far as they are a source of ideas. In Kant's terms, human beings have value as means rather than
    ends. And so on. I think I've waffled on enough about this.

    BTW the quotes from Campbell were depressing, and display a mind-numbing conformity to conventional
    thinking. To say (of personal love) that "That's completely contrary to everything the Church stood
    for. It's a personal, individual experience, and I think it's the essential thing that's great
    about the West and that makes it different from all other traditions I know" simply displays
    astonishing historical ignorance. Where does he think the language for the troubadour tradition came
    from, if not from the 'Song of Solomon' and all the contemporaneous commentaries on it? Campbell
    seems blithely unaware that Bernard of Clairvaux was the generation before Chretien de Troyes, and
    that the troubadours adapted religious language for their purposes in just the same way that modern
    pop songs are derived from religious singing. (If you're interested, see 'The discovery of the
    individual, 1050 - 1200", by Colin Morris). Grrrr!!

    Sam

    "Phaedrus is fascinated too by the description of the motive of 'duty toward self' which is an
    almost exact translation of the Sanskrit word 'dharma', sometimes described as the 'one' of the
    Hindus. Can the 'dharma' of the Hindus and the 'virtue' of the Ancient Greeks be identical?" - The
    Eudaimonic MoQ says yes. "Lightning hits!"

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